Hey everyone,
My name is Cr4zyDuck and from now on Iβll be reviewing onahole products on this blog !
Iβm a french student of 20 years old, also the youngest reviewer of the team but the most important thing you got to keep in mind is that Iβm a freaking otaku trash believing in 2D only and whoβs completly perverted by hentai, eroge and doujinshi. Anime girls are the best. 3D sucks, point.
Anyway,
Yoroshiku Onegaishimasu, Mina-san! ~ γγγγγγγγγγΎγγγΏγͺγγ!
In fact, I was waiting to receive my last order before publishing any review, but something bad happened so Iβd like to share it with everyone here so that youβll all be aware of the risk which βordering abroadβ may implyβ¦
So to sum it up
β Did I do something illegal ? β βImporting onahole isnβt wrong right ?β βWhat if they open up the package and see my big bro is a perv packaging ?β βWhat will happen to me, will I have to pay a fine ?β βWill it be grasped ? Or will I even go to jail for importing some loli content ?β βThe package is undervalued, what will happen if they notice it ??β¦β
Yeah, to be honest I really started becoming paranoidβ¦
And finaly yesterday, as usual waking up in the middle of the afternoon after having spent the whole night watching anime ^-^, again checked on local traking website if by any chance the status had changed, But nope. Fuckβ¦
Then, I remembered that big sis told me to empty the trash. Took the trash, went out of the appartment, took the elevator and reached the main lobby of my building. And then, while passing in front of my mailbox, I quickly took a peek through the slot to check if any package was waiting inside. But nope. Damn itβ¦
After that, I turned back andβ¦ aside from the stairway leading to the underground and parking lot, there was a big box. I donβt know why but I directly knew that it was mine, and on the moment I yeld out loud βWhat the fu** ??β
Yup, it was mine. And I found it exactly as on the pictures I took afterward ~
Destroyed, the top of the box was completly screwed up, as if someone torned it apart hands free. Air-cushion and paper were scattered around the package too, with inside some onaholeβs box which had been opened up, plastic and packaging removed and box partially destroyed (my big bro and 17 bordeaux).
I was dumbounded. Never in my life something like thise had ever happened to me.
Ok, so first off I was angry as fuck toward the postman. It was HIS responsability to deliver the package against MY signature only, or my mother if I wasnβt home. I donβt know what the fuck happened here, but it seems that he left my packaging in the lobby, without even ringing to my door even though I was home. (my sister didnβt notice anything either). Then, I donβt think itβs the postman who opened the package, but rather those freaking junkies who keeps on hanging out outside and inside the building (smoking weed, taging walls, drinking shitβ¦)
On one hand, I might be lucky since I happened to found the package by myself with βbarelyβ all the content left inside. But on an other hand I canβt accept that a package, which value is more than 90β¬ can be delivered and treated like this on itβs way homeβ¦
I though about this later, but seriously if I didnβt went outside to empty the trash, I would have never found itβ¦ I might still be waiting as stupid as I am for the parcel to come, checking the traking daily and becoming more and more stressed for having done something bad by ordering Japanese onaholeβ¦
And then, how long did it stayed in the main lobby ? My name was written on the freaking shipping label⦠how many person did see it with onahole boxes exceeding from the cardboard ?
Fuckβ¦ this is just a violation of my privacy. Now some dude here knows that Iβm ordering this stuff, and Iβm ashamed of thatβ¦ hopefully my parents are actually on holidays, I donβt even know how I would have reacted in case my mum would have found it while coming back from shoppingβ¦
Ok well, thatβs it for the storyβ¦ sorry I tried to make it short but it was kind of difficult.
After that, I went to the nearby post office, I explained them everything and they simply told me to either send a mail to their customer service or to call them. I kinda played the dumb here though, because I told them that the content of the package was gone. They believed me without asking for proofs so thatβs fine.
But I canβt accept that. I wonβt give up until they refund me for the damages and their unprofessional work. Aside from the material damages, itβs my personal privacy which has been exposed to everybody here and thatβs what annoys me the most. Iβm done being nice to the other while people keeps fucking me up.
But this time I donβt give a shit and Iβll also abuse the system, fuck that shit Iβm not that an idiot to keep my mouth shut. Hopefully no one was nearby me when I found it, because I would have beat the hell out of them since I was pissed off as fuck.
This again, is a simple example of how fucked up and unfair 3D life is. While tons of other people arenβt doing shit and keep enjoying the benifts provided by other. Being honest and good doesnβt mean anything, if youβre the kind one then people will fuck you up and youβll end up being left alone as an idiot.
What a meanlingless sense of lifeβ¦ why da hell do I have to live in this shitty world ? If I could, I would have escaped this life for 2D a long time agoβ¦ Come on Japan! One day, one day I know for sure that as ingenious as you guys are youβre going to find a way for desesparated otaku like myself to find redemption by going living in 2Dβ¦ like when the VR technology will be at its peak or somethingβ¦
I know you guys can do it, I mean since youβve already developped some freaking futuristic onaholes like this awesomeness !
THIS fellow Otakus, is the future! Being able to fuck your favorite 2D waifu 24 fucking 7 whenever the hell you want, nice Japan !
Here, a pic of the onaholeβs boxes I get even though some of them were opened by those dumbass ~
From left to right:Β My big brother is a pervert, JU-C PUTI 1, The Mouth of Truth,Β Tenga Egg,Β Seventeen BordeauxΒ and Scent of School Girl Love Juice.Β
In fact, I wrote this article because this kind of situation could happen to anybody whoβs ordering stuff abroad. Just keep in mind that those stories doesnβt always happen to the others, sometimes you could be the one whoβs going to be dragged in the shitβ¦ like it was for me here. I donβt really have any tips to give since itβs a rather unpredictable and rare situation. But even though, be carefull youβre not 100% safe. Keep that in mind before ordering anything. But from now on, I wonβt exceed a total value of 60β¬ for these kind of order, then always try to select SAL/registred since itβs the safest way of shipping if you want to avoid customs shit.
Iβve also told my neighboor to take any package delivered by the postamn if he ever comes when Iβm out or something. I bet itβs safer because I know him since a long time now. But other than thatβ¦ if youβre like me, living in a big city, in a big building with lots of peopleβ¦ you canβt really predict nor do anything else. Just hope that everything will be fine. At the opposite, if youβre living in a village or in some quite and peacefull place, then hopefully those kind of thing shouldnβt be happening.
Iβm not intending to scare you or anything, but simply making you guys realise that those kind of thing can happen, so please be carefull.
In my case, Iβm actually still struggling with my local post service in order to find a solution. I think any possible refund is out of the question, even though I lied to them about the content :3
But itβs truely a pain in the arse, at least here in france since these folks are some real moron who donβt even know what the fuck theyβre doingβ¦
At the very least, OtonaJPβs customer service is truly awesome! They helped me out with this and even now weβre still in touch by mail in order to resolve the problem. So I would say, if you ever got trouble with an order from their website, then donβt worry because the staff is really kind, friendly and helpfull :3
I hope you enjoyed this article even tough there were a lot of text ~ but next time for sure I will post a review of one of the product I received with this order !
So stay tuned buddies =)
does anyone know what happened to that article on here about some guy named Doppler or Dongler or similar and he got arrested and had to plea to a Peace Bond over one of the Magic Eyes products?
canβt seem to find the story not sure if it got removed, a few 4chan threads still reference it. Canβt remember which model he got charged for.
Hey i have a quastion because ive ordered from OtonaJP for about 270 $ and beside a bottle of lube it cotains three hardcore-Loli-themed Onaholes:
β Sujiman Kupa Cocolo;
β Puni Ana DX
β Tuomi
The box will obviously be heavy (over 6 KG) and the price is pretty high. No im worried that i get in trouble ecause of the Loli-Artwork. (i personaly dont care much about the taxes. thats the least problem)
Do You have any experience or shared experience about the situation in germany? do i have to fear them to check the Parcel?
will i get in trouble if they do?
Im a little nervous. The last times i ordered from OtonaJP, J-List or Motsutoys everything went well but the parcels werenβt that big and heavy like now.
What is your experience or maybe there were people shared their experience with you? β¦
I would be thankful !
Greetings
Edit: Sorry, my Keyboard swallows the letters sometimesβ¦
The Third Onahole is βTubomiβ
Bonjour
Petite infos pour les franΓ§ais qui commande des βproduits culturelβ venu du japon (18+ ou pas dβailleurs), les envois pas Ems arrive Γ Orly et dβaprΓ¨s ce que jβai appris par le passΓ© via des amis qui bosse aux douanes et Γ des gentilles assistantes tΓ©lΓ©phonique, le bureau de Douane dβOrly nβest pas obligΓ© de suivre les rΓ©glementations des douanes national que ce soit en termes de frais de douanes ou de non respect de la vie privΓ©e . Γ joie . Donc commander par Ems cβest effectivement de la roulette russe, ils vΓ©rifient si ils veulent, et ils dΓ©cident de combien ils taxent (ou pas, parfois), moi jβavais commandΓ© un PVC de Kof chez hlj il y a 2 ans et ils ont voulus que je paye une taxe sur la figurine Γ 90% de sa valeur (la fig valait 60 euros et 50 euros de frais de douane), jβai refusΓ© et jβai expliquΓ© aux gens des douanes Γ Marseille quβun produit culturel cβΓ©tait 25 % max ( en 2017), et jβai eu gain de cause . Mais jβai aussi une question sur otona.jp, est ce que cβest safe aux niveau douanier de commander chez eux avec un envoi βair smal packetβ ? Merci
Oui gΓ©nΓ©ralement Γ§a pose pas souci pour une valeur infΓ©rieure Γ 100 β¬ π
Je regardais pour faire une commande sur kimochiishop pour la première fois, mais du coup je ne sais pas quelle méthode de shipping il faut privilégier ?
Ils proposent:
β AIRMAIL REGISTERED SMALL PACKET
β Ferry/Surface (trΓ¨s longβ¦)
β DHL
β AIRMAIL REGISTERED INTERNATIONAL
β EMS
Quelle est la meilleur mΓ©thode ?
Merci!
Ca y es tu me fait peur la je suis du nord est aussi et ca ma première commande sur otonajp .
This sucks what happens to your order!
I once ordered a onahole from J-List, it got caught up by the custom service in Germany.
I had to visit the office and should open the box! Man that was embarrassing I can tell you!
I said it was a gift for a friend but the customs official only smiled at me π βLittle joke huh!β
After I payed some charge, I could leave the office but there was now problem with the content!
I mean I even made an order to print some real perverted pictures by an online photoshop.
No problems at all, I think if it isnβt too real or hard/intense whatever everything will be fine.
This is so strange, in France nor postal service or cutsom ever asked me to open up the package in front of them. This sounds so stupid to me.
Salut Cr4zyDuck. Pour un problΓ¨me personnel jβaimerai bien te contacter par mail (je mets le mien dans ce commentaire. Jβaimerai avoir un conseil sur quelque chose en particulier, je sais mΓͺme pas si tu pourra me rΓ©pondre mais je prΓ©fΓ¨re demander π
Merci de me contacter si tu peux !
Tu peux mβenvoyer un mail Γ cette adresse: awesomeduck40 {at} gmail.com π
ah man that really sucks dude! I know i would have been freaking out if that happened to me. recently I ordered monster wet kiwami and sujiman kupa cocolo and it arrived a day late. It arrived when I was in the shower and i literally threw on a robe for fear that my folks would arrive any second. I hope this doesnβt happen to you again.
Awesome you did order cocolo ? Iβm dreaming of buying this onahip someday but Iβm scared as fuck because of customs since the two only shipping method available on otonaJP would be EMS (no way in hellβ¦) or airmal.
Did you order it with the packaging ? Thatβs the main thing which might be troublesome to me. I want it so bad but at the same time, I donβt want to end up in jail because of having ordered and onahip. Ordering without the box is also a possibility but arggh, what a waste :/
I got it from toydemon when they had the buy one get one 50 percent off for magic eyes products. They remove the box it came in automatically, a shame but I have enough loli onaholes lying around that Iβm not too bothered by the hip not having the packaging. Its a pretty good hip, the suction is not pronounced as they proclaim it to be but the vagina texture is very nice. Anal is tight but not as pronounced in texture as the vaginal one.
Oh my that really sucks, thank you for sharing.
Iβve had the Post Office hold onto my goods (or even DHL β I hates them) and charge me for customs/Excise before from some shipments from Japan (EMS) /China (but no problems from Hong Kong so far) and USA (Priority express) (that happens too often from the βMurrica). I live in Ireland BTW.
Seriously, DHL makes it so compliacted to pay Duties/Excise⦠you have to log into some compliacted corporate looking Logistical website, then pray your credit card can be registered to pay the 40 quid you owe for a box you received last month.
My post office recently started providing a PostPal service where they provide a forwarding address to northern Ireland (technically United Kingdom) before sending it to my local post office down south. They have always been good to bring things back to the Depot if I wasnβt at home to sign for it (I donβt trust my neighbour for my sex toys LoL).
I could also use Parcel Motel (Nightline Deliveries).. Maximum Locker size 41 Γ 38 Γ 64 cmβ¦It might just about fit. the last shipment box I got from Toy Demon is : W31 x H31 x 46cm deep.
Iβm actually not that worried with the versions of onaholes, tentacles, monster gucho beast onaholes, parody stuff. They better go arresting Catholic priests first if they want to chase after us harmless Onahole enthusiasts LoL. As long as the goods get to me!
Duties
Iβve had good luck with Toy Demon (once out of three times I was charged tax by customs). KanojoToys (I got caught twice for tax thereβ¦).
Man thatβs what truly pisses me off, we arenβt doing anything wrong here simply masturbate with some rubber toys with 2D artwork. What if there is a loli on the box ? She doesnβt exist after all (unfortunatelyβ¦) so who cares ? Thatβs bullshit to me, those politics are fucked up. These dudes should rather try to arrest the real dangerous people out there, like the pervert and stuff rather than messing with otaku trash like usβ¦
Youβre living in Ireland ? I heard custom where hell in UKβ¦ Iβm going in England soon for an internship, I wonβt be able to order anything from japan during 6 weeks :/
Hi yeah, Iβm in Ireland.
According to the Tracking: the shipping seems to always first come through France or Germany before reaching the depots here in Ireland (whether it is coming from USA or Japan or China). So I donβt know about the UK. I do know is that a number of UK retailers wonβt ship to Parcel forwarding addresses at all (HMV or Nintendo for example). According to Nightline Deliveries/Parcel Motel, according to their press release when they reached one million deliveries here in Ireland: the number one genre of posted items is βadult toysβ.
Iβm looking at getting 17Bordeaux at some point, and the Sujiman Kupa is on my wish list too. I see itβs listed on Amazon.com (USA) LoL (pun intended). π
Haha hi (ou salut?) jβai eu un problΓ¨me du genre, Chronopost a mΓͺme pas sonnΓ© chez moi le livreur a mΓͺme pas voulu se donner la peine de le faire et a renvoyΓ© le colis au japon. Je suis encore en attente du renvoi par Otonajp, trΓ¨s bon site ouaip !
Chronopost ? Donc tβa pris EMS pour lβenvoi ? JβΓ©vite vraiment ce truc comme la peste, jβai eu deux figurines dβenvoyΓ©s par amiami et jβai dΓ» payer plus de 50 euros de taxes pour chacune. Les colis sont contrΓ΄lΓ©s Γ 99% donc lβutiliser pour une commande dβonahole je suis pas trΓ¨s chaud persoβ¦ supposons que le mec Γ la douane lβouvre et trouve un bel exemplaire de Kocollo Γ lβintΓ©rieur, on est parti pour les emmerdesβ¦
Ce qui est marrant cβest que cβest toujours une fois que le colis arrive en France que sa merde, alors quβau Japon jamais aucun soucisβ¦ lmao
Ouais je savais pas haha, mβenfin jβespΓ¨re ne pas avoir de soucis jβai pris un Seventeen Bordeaux soft sans vraiment rΓ©flΓ©chirβ¦
Jverrai, si je finis en prison je te tiendrai au courant!
Ok lol ~ aprΓ¨s 17 bordeaux je lβai aussi (mais la version normale) et jβai pas eu de soucis pour le faire importer. Tant que yβa pas de loli sur la boite sa devrait passer. AprΓ¨s est-ce que en France on peut vraiment aller en taule pour sa ? Franchement je trouverai sa abuser quand mΓͺmeβ¦
Pour du loli oui, tβas pas vu lβaffaire du gars quβa fait doujin fr c la. Y avait du loli sur son site et il a fait 6 mois de taule. Alors si on a des jouets sexuels avec des lolis Γ§a peut aller loin je pense.
Non jamais entendu parler, hormis pour lβaffaire du canadien et de sa commande de Cocoloβ¦ mβenfin cβest juste de la fiction ptn. Sa me fanne sans dec, cβest pour sa que pour lβinstant jβose pas commande dβonahip. La plupart de ceux que je veux sont basΓ© sur des lolis. Commander sans la boite, seule possibilitΓ©, mais sa me brise le coeur π
Ce pays devient nβimporte quoi, on a mΓͺme pas le droit dβacheter un sextoy par ce que
sur la boite y a un dessin ?
Bref en suivant ma commande sur le site EMS, je vois retenu pour vΓ©rification Γ la douane.
VoilΓ pourquoi je vais voter FN, ils ont trop de boulot pour faire chier les victimes du colonialisme africain qui trouvent pas de copine.
Soit disant replis sur soit, mais les frontiΓ¨res si elles gΓ¨nent quelquβun aujourdβhui cβest les FranΓ§ais, et pas les clandestins, mais ils ont raison, concentront la population de la planΓ¨te en un seul point, le monde doit Γͺtre bien triste de vivre en dehors de france.
Et je suppose quβil nβy a quβen france quβil se trouve de lβoxygΓ¨neβ¦
Ciao et merci pour ton blog.
Yeah I had this happen with two packages from otonaJP, one came a day after the other. First one I got the box was beat to hell but the packaging inside was fine. The second one was also beat to hell and one of the toy boxes was slightly damaged. Iβm starting to think that the customs over in japan had something to do with it cause I monitored the package and it stayed in Osaka for over 2 weeks before being shipped to the US.
Dear Aeraesoria,
we believe we have already answered your mail and now we are in touch with you about the problem. Some damage happen to a package is unfortunate but thats why the packages are insured to be ready in case soemthing happens.
Maybe an information that is not only helpful for you but also for others is that it seems you are confused about where the package was. When a package leaves Japan it gets scanned as βDispatch from outward office of exchangeβ. After that the package is not anymore in Japan and then the next scan happens with the package arrives in the country of destination. So the package as it was for example a SAL package took to 2 weeks to arrive your country but did not stay 2 weeks in Japan.
We know that easily that can be confused so this info might also be helpful for others.
Hiromi san from otonaJP
I really like your transition from weeb life to fatalistic nihilism and back
I had that once, so I try to get the shipment to be left in the post office. Then I could go pick it up without worrying about it because being lost or stolen.
Did you order it via registered?
Registred SAL small packet